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Do you frequently watch mom influencers or dad influencers online and feel inspired to follow their parenting techniques? If you do so, you aren’t alone! Yes, many parents are inspired by such perfectionism shown online.

However, striving for perfectionism in parenting just because someone’s doing it happily in social media reels is not as great a thing to do as it looks. We have seen many parents feeling guilty of not being able to do what the ones on screen are doing. At Delhi Public School Sushant Lok, positioned as one of the best school in Gurgaon, we see it as the ‘mirage of perfect parenting,’ which is unsustainable and only leaves parents feeling more exhausted and guilty. 

Having said that, we understand that as parents, you can definitely create perfect experiences or moments at times with your kids. However, remember that they’re impossible to replicate every single day. Consistency in your actions is what will make your parenting journey more effective and rewarding, not perfectionism. The following points will help you understand why consistency is key in parenting and not perfectionism.

• Consistent actions help your kids learn and develop steady habits

As parents, it is important for you to understand that your child’s brain is like a pattern-recognition machine, which constantly looks for repetition to make sense of the world. This means every time you follow the same bedtime routine, your kid’s brain registers a pattern. Devices set aside for next-day use signal wind-down time, and turning off the lights means sleep time is approaching.

These repeated actions make their body produce melatonin on cue. If you do it once perfectly, then their brain will log it as a random event. But if you do it imperfectly yet consistently, then your kids will build a neural pathway that helps them self-regulate. This principle applies to everything.

Hence, to build healthy and sustained habits in your kids, you must remain consistent with your actions, so that those habits eventually become their automatic responses and a part of their behaviour.

• Sustainable parenting prevents burnout and resentment

If you keep focusing on perfection over consistency, it can unknowingly turn you into an unavailable parent. For instance, if you put all your energy into curating Pinterest-worthy activities and cooking all organic, homemade meals from scratch, you are more likely to crash. This crash may manifest as endless scrolling on the phone instead of engaging with your kids or snapping at them over small things.

The guilt that follows these actions puts parents into a vicious cycle of perfectionism, exhaustion, and resentment towards themselves. Hence, choosing consistency over perfectionism is always the best option. Consistency is built on realistic expectations that you can maintain even during stressful weeks, sick days, and chaotic mornings.

• Consistent boundaries teach responsibility

Children, in most cases, are always testing, pushing boundaries, negotiating, and feeling anxious because they never quite know where the line is. For them, ‘maybe’ means ‘probably no, but also possibly yes if they whine enough.’

If you set seemingly perfect rules that exist on Monday but disappear by Friday when everyone’s exhausted, then you subconsciously teach your kids that boundaries are negotiable and that persistence in the wrong direction pays off.

Parents who genuinely want their kids to foster responsibility should stick to consistent rules. So, for example, when your kids ask for dessert before dinner, telling them a firm ‘no, dessert is only given after dinner,’ and adhering to it every time, not just teaches them to control their impulses, but also helps them follow the right routine with consistency.

• Imperfect consistency models resilience

We at Delhi Public School Sushant Lok have observed that kids look up to their parents as role models. If you always strive for perfection, your response to failure may teach kids that mistakes are catastrophic. They can also assume that anything less than flawless is shameful, and this may tempt them to hide their struggles.

Parents who don’t want their kids to absorb this belief should start demonstrating consistency over perfection. So, for example, when you try a new approach to morning routines and it fails, remain open to adjusting it and try again the next day. If you continue showing up instead of giving up, you’re unknowingly modelling resilience.

Such acts of perseverance teach your kids that true competence means showing up despite imperfection. Kids will automatically start following the same responses over time, which will build a strong foundation for a fulfilling life.

Conclusion

Every parent wants to do their best while raising kids, and in this pursuit, they often turn to perfectionism. While it may seem like the best option, it can leave you feeling anxious, drained, guilty, and even resentful towards yourself. Not to forget, perfectionism is highly unsustainable and may not benefit your kids as you anticipated.

Hence, we at Delhi Public School Sushant Lok, one of the well-known CBSE school in Gurgaon, would like to advise all the parents reading this blog post that if you want your kids to develop healthy habits and beliefs, then start being more consistent with your actions. Choosing consistency over perfection can help you nurture your kids in a healthy way while making you feel satisfied. Maintaining consistency is the most challenging part, but once you get a hold of it, your entire parenting journey can become smooth.