What does your child do when he/she gets stuck with a difficult task? Calls you up for help? And what you as a parent do then – either help out the kid or ask the child to try doing it again? Right! Experts suggest that jumping in to help the kids with their work is not a good thing to do for the parents. But then, is merely asking them to do it by themselves really enough? No! The key to making the kids keep trying until they attain success lies in the words of motivation from the people they most often look up to, and that’s the parents.
Motivational words from the parents work as the driving force that keeps the children going when faced with a difficult situation. At DPS Sushant Lok, a renowned CBSE school in Gurgaon, we believe that sound motivational strategies can make a considerable difference in the learning initiatives, and thereby, the performance of children in academic as well as extracurricular spheres. And, the foremost aspect of such strategies is making just a few simple changes in the way you phrase your words while trying to encourage your little ones.
On that note, let’s discuss today a couple of phrases that we believe must be ‘totally avoided’ when the aim is to motivate and engage kids in learning.
“You’re going to fail if you don’t learn”
We, DPS Sushant Lok, strongly believe that using fear as a motivator is something that you must always refrain from. Trust us; it does more harm than good to the kids. Such intimidation decreases their intrinsic desire to learn and creates a fear of failure in young minds. Rather than instilling the fear and anxiety associated with failure, the better way out is to turn their attention towards the desired goal. Thus, telling them things like “doing your homework will help you understand the type of questions that might be there on the test” serve the purpose much better than “you’re going to fail if you don’t study!”
“Your classmate has done so much better than you”
The self-esteem of kids is a delicate thing, and it’s one aspect of their personality that has to be tended and developed from a young age. But when comparison is used as a motivating factor, their self-confidence takes a hit, and the kids feel like they aren’t enough. Being one of the best CBSE schools in Gurgaon, we can vouch that every child is a storehouse of unique potential. The need is to nurture and encourage them in the right manner, rather than putting through comparisons.
“You will get a treat/playtime if you complete this lesson”
The thing about treats and playtime is that they are good enough as rewards, but not so much to provide motivation for active engagement in learning. Learning should be driven by a desire to seek knowledge and not as a way to earn treats or get playtime. A better approach would be to say something like, “you have worked really hard to score so well in the subject. You deserve a treat!” This way, their efforts can be appreciated, and they’ll be motivated to keep up the good work.
“You did well, but you could have done better”
Any compliment that is followed by the word “but” takes away the essence of the compliment itself. In order to keep the kids motivated to constantly do well, you will have to celebrate with them even the small victories and milestones that they achieve. So, let’s consider that the goal is to improve the kids’ performance in the annual examination. Why not praise their efforts wholeheartedly when they make even small improvements in those practice tests?
“I’m not happy with your work”
We understand that frustration and disappointment are obvious sentiments to some of the mistakes that the children make. And, it’s also true that your aim as loving and caring parents is always to ensure that the kids do better than before. Thus, rather than saying that their work is not satisfactory, it’s more effective to try something as “let’s try another method of doing this.” It positions you as an ally in their efforts, and that in itself is a huge motivation for them.
At DPS Sushant Lok, one of the foremost CBSE schools in Gurgaon, we believe that a well-motivated child is someone who is likely to continue going on the right path, even when the roads become rough. And that can happen only when children are dealt with in the right way and are provided with a constant dose of motivation and encouragement. Hence, be the cheerleaders for your children and make sure they never run short of the much-needed encouragement from your side.